Building an Environment That Fosters Emotional Wellness
Written by Dr. Pia Boben Fenimore
As previously emphasized, mental illness is both treatable and preventable, and these strategies help with both. It does not take daily yoga, expensive therapies, or soothing aromatherapy to create an environment that fosters emotional wellness. It is a lot more basic than that.
Family Dinner. Only 30% of American families have regular family dinners, yet the mental health benefits are huge. Studies show that children who consistently have regular meals with their family have less depression and anxiety, and they even get better grades. One study showed that teenagers actually like and look froward to family meals! Define family and dinner any way you want, but set aside time 3-4 days per week to share a meal with your child. It is not about what you eat, it is about being together and allowing the world to pause briefly during that time. But the world is a busy place, and it seems like there is a target on the back of family mealtime, so you must be prepared to defend it. Ensuring that all neighborhoods have access to healthy food at affordable prices, finding easy prep recipes, and educating families about the importance of family dinner will have an impact on mental health and go a long way towards prevention.
Self-Care. It is very difficult to make a difference in a child’s life if you are struggling in your own. Anxiety and depression are contagious. Take the time and resources needed to be in a place where you are emotionally healthy so you can pass that on to your child. Go to the doctor, the therapist, the gym, a friend’s house, whatever you need to be healthy, calm, and happy…make it happen. Studies show that children who live with a parent with a mental health disorder are twice as likely to develop an emotional or behavioral disorder. As we shine the light on mental health in this country, let us focus it on parents. Early diagnosis of postpartum depression, support for single parents who are higher risk for mood disorders, and easy access to mental health therapies are all critical for the prevention and treatment of behavioral health problems in kids.
Be Present. Research shows that it only takes one consistent, caring adult in a child’s life to prevent mood disorders, violence, and substance abuse. We know from studies of the workplace that distractions greatly decrease productivity and quality of work, the same is true of parenting. It is so easy to be distracted when we are supposed to be focused on our children. Put the phone away, turn off the TV, and quiet your thoughts when you spend time with your kids. Listen to them. Ask them open-ended questions. Show up for their school conferences, sporting events, and recitals whenever possible.
Create a world where there is something to believe in. What are your family values? Whether they be religious, socially conscious, or simple commitments, it is necessary to make them prominently known to your child. Notice that I did not say that you need to mandate that your child have the same values, although chances are if you make them a priority your children will model you. Values provide a framework for decision making as well as structure for kids and teens; this is turn fosters resilience and security when life gets hard. Family values can be respecting elders, prioritizing time together, giving to charities, showing gratitude, or even something as seemingly trivial as celebrating a holiday. A child who is raised with known values will use them to develop their own core values, which will serve as a guidebook through difficult times.
A Place to Start:
Visit a website:
https://thefamilydinnerproject.org/food/
Read a book:
Teach Your Children Well, by Madeline Levine
Make a change:
Commit to eating a meal together 3 days a week
